Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Passing Time

One thing I've noticed that I've been doing lately is passing time. I keep myself pretty busy, but a lot of the reason is because I'm passing time. Planning to do these few things before I go to this appointment, taking some time to get this stuff in order so I am ready for tomorrow's things. Constant planning doesn't make for much appreciation of what I am doing in the present moment. And of course the obvious question, passing time until what?

For awhile, I thought I was a pretty exceptional girl scout, always able to prepare myself well for whatever was coming, able to shift plans 'spontaneously' because I'd prepared for a wide range of possibilities. Now, it seems less about achieving a badge for efficiency and more about forgetting that the process is the most important experience in anything I'm doing.

It seems so easy to comprehend, and has been said by so many others - "Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans" - but my mind kept pulling me back into the grind of planning regardless of this knowledge. I set expectations for myself that I had to achieve, which caused my mind to remain unsettled until, as it claimed, 'it got where it needed to be'. I wasn't yet where I wanted to be so I had to just remain diligent and aware that I wasn't yet 'ready' to move forward.

But, luckily, there is a loving person in my life who was able to reign me back from my illogically logical mechanical madness and remind me that the reason I do anything is because I exist and want to experience that existence.

At this point in time, I need to be continually reminded that I have all the power in my world. That creativity is borne only from my desire to have an amazing experience in my world.

I imagine that's where the importance of having a community can come into play. Upon reflection of the tumult that has been going on these days, in the middle east, in the eurozone, in our US cities at all of the Occupy movements, it seems clear. Humanity, above all, wants to be a part of a community where every person can grow, love, and be completely themselves without any judgement. That type of community would allow people to flourish, because their enjoyment of life would involve doing the things that inspire them, while also caring for and working to co-exist with the rest of their community. Enhancing and improving all aspects of the life we encounter is in our nature. Truly.

But. The glorious but. Can that world still exist, in a world that has so ignorantly forgotten their human community? Those who go out on the streets and protest without full understanding of the power they've been distracted into handing over the past decades, being called hippies and vermin (yes, I've heard this) by the people who have long forgotten to love thy neighbor, to make sure that they and those around them have the necessary means to survive before needlessly judging them and trying to condemn them because they live a life that they don't agree with or understand?

Either the world will release it's deeply held tension, or humanity will become part of the history books. I'll always continue to hope, because that lightness is what drives inspiration, awe, and adventure. Since our apocalypse may be imminent, I think I'll just enjoy what I'm doing right now.


P.S. Wikipedia is doing a fundraising drive - you'd be lying if you said you've never gotten lost on an endless informational tangent that Wikipedia so fluidly leads you through. Even $5 would help. They have a link directly to Paypal - you can shuffle around your money without ever seeing it more than ever before! Here's the link. (No I don't work for them)